Happy Birthday, MIKE!: Jersey Shore, Season 5 Episode 3

Jersey Shore; S5E3

By: Nina


Well, it’s our first episode without Vinny. This was probably the most evident when Deena discovers the news of his leaving at the club and proceeds to cry hysterically, insisting that Vinny was apart of her soul…As Jwoww puts it, “Deena’s very dramatic about everything. Hearing Vinny stubbed his toe she might have cried.”

When the initial shock of Vinny’s departure is over the gang returns to their usual routines, starting with a Meatball Day for Deena and Snooki. And the concept of a Meatball Day doesn’t really require a recap, does it? We know what it entails, which is of course them dancing on bars with their kookah’s hanging out, furry boots and at least one of them getting too drunk to walk. But let me at least say this: should I in the future ever drink so much I cannot walk, may I be as lucky as Snooki to have two gay men holding me up and walking me to safety.

Though for anyone who did miss Meatball Day, there was indeed a hilarious dance sequence that I would recommend you try to catch. Oh, and by the end of Meatball Day this is what Deena’s hair looked like:

And thank goodness for Jenni, the only one able to suggest they deep condition her hair (and does it for her) and saves the day! Meanwhile, it is Mike and Pauly’s birthday week! Mike will be turning 30, while Pauly is 31. While at the bar, Mike sees a girl they refer to as the “Bosnian Chick”, who he met at The Shore Store. But when his consistent hook-up and “main squeeze” Paula shows up, Mike hands the Bosnian Chick over to Pauly as a birthday gift. Except when Bosnian Chick comes to the house it is revealed that she does not want to sleep with Pauly. Pauly tells her, “You can come to bed or I can call you a cab. It’s up to you.” Bosnian Chick looks to Sammi for support, but we know Sammi. She’s not coming to to this girls aid anytime soon.

As far as Pauly is concerned, and I quote, it should be against the law to come to his house a 4 in the morning and not give him birthday sex. Later, when Mike’s girl Paula is in the shower, the Bosnian comes back! She tells Pauly that she wants to hangout with Mike if Pauly doesn’t want to hangout. Although Mike had Paula over, he was polite to the Bosnian, and she did get the picture when she realized Paula was still there.

The next day, for Pauly’s birthday Pauly’s mom not only surprises him with his entire family but his LOCAL BARBER as well. Now there’s a true guido present! As the festivities continue, Mike begins to feel more and more left out. He feels that with Pauly’s friends and family present that most of the focus is naturally on Pauly. You can’t blame Pauly’s family for putting the attention on Pauly, of course. The disappointing part comes along when the roomies make a cake for Pauly, and not for Mike.

I know that Mike stirs up drama, but how hard would it have been to simply put Mike’s name on the cake as well? It’s your roommates 30th birthday, and you can’t celebrate someone else’s birthday and not acknowledge the other. It’s just not right, polite or nice! As the episode goes on you can tell Mike is behaving withdrawn and sort of out of it. And all of a sudden, we see him walk outside! Pauly then says, “Mike did the dip.” Ronnie then says, “Mike’s gone.” Did he leave for good? That seems to be what they’re saying! I guess we’ll find out more in the following episode!

Episode Hall-of-Fame:

Mike Analogy of the Week: Comparing meeting girls to shopping. “I’m like a shopper. You know, at a store. I see something I like, I’m like “Come with me.”

Best Quote: “I actually really like Paula. She may be dirty, grimey and disgusting, but she’s just a nice girl.” -Sammi. Wow, if I didn’t know any better Sammi I’d say it sounds like you don’t like Paula!

Episode MVP: Jenni. She has to took care of Deena when out drinking, took care of Deena when she came home from her own day of drinking with a mess in her hair and didn’t participate in the birthday cake fiasco.

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